All Sewn Up

Oh hai. I guess it’s been awhile. Sorry. Really, so sorry. It’s been a busy year. And one reason it’s been busy is because I’ve been learning a new thing: sewing. Yeah, because I needed something else to take up most of my budget and a lot of space. Why are my hobbies never of the inexpensive and compact variety?

I’ve always wanted to learn to sew, specifically clothes. Once upon a time (aka high school), I was going to be a fashion designer. Have my own line of clothes that would look good on regular people, not just rail-thin models. Ah, the dreams of optimistic youth. With that in mind, I tried to sketch outfits, only to realize I lack any drawing skills at all. Then I got a sewing machine, and a few half-hearted attempts to make things which, more or less universally, sucked. I’m not sure I realized at the time what it would take to learn, or I just didn’t have enough desire or patience. So eventually my sister got my sewing machine, and I got on with my life.

Twenty years later, I’m exhausted and angry, trying to find clothing that actually fits my body.This proves to be impossible. In a fit of rage, I declare that I will learn to sew, so help me Hannah, or die in the effort. I got a sewing machine for my birthday and then bought ALL the sewing books. And I read them. I read about patterns, and how to alter them, and seams and fabrics until I thought my head would explode (it didn’t, luckily).

So far, I’ve done mostly simple projects, working on keeping my seams even and learning to cut in a straight line, which is WAY harder than it sounds. A few pillows, table runner, a baby blanket and some sleeping shorts, so mostly square things. But I’m doing the thing I didn’t have the patience for in high school. I am learning. Step by step, and sometimes the hard way (ok, most of the time).

I doubt sincerely that I will ever become the next Zac Posen; but if I need a skirt or a dress for a thing, I will much happier putting in the effort to create what I want, rather than crying in a dressing room under bad fluorescent lighting because nothing looks right.

So long, mainstream clothing manufacturers, I have been too long at your mercy. No more.

This Was the Day

This is the day I remember. The day I always remember. This was the day it happened. I do not always agree with my country or its policies. I think our political system is broken beyond repair. We fight amongst ourselves so much it looks like a civil war sometimes. But this was the day we stopped. This was the day we were all Americans. No matter our political or socio-economic status, we were one. And this was the day that happened.
We are a country that tries. We try to help. We try to fix things that are broken, sometimes even things that aren't broken. We are not infalliable. Sometimes we don't know what the right thing to do might be. Sometimes we get it wrong.
But the terrorists did not break us. They never will. Because we keep fixing, keep helping, sometimes to our own detriment. We keep trying.
Because this was the day it happened.

Learning to Live

Nothing lasts forever, you know. Not sadness. Not homesickness. Not even grief. And if anyone tells you that you cannot grieve the loss of a city of residence, you spit in their eye, because they are wrong. Ask any Armed Forces family, forced to hoist sails by orders from above every four, eight or twelve years. You can lose a city, even if you never owned a house there; it can still be your home, and it can still rip out your heart when you have to leave.
It was the right choice to make. I get to spend more time with my husband, enough to realize that I do, in fact, still love him. I have a temp job right now, that I like quite a bit. I'm considering enrollment in the local community college, to take a few courses in accounting (i know, right?). I'm starting to speak to people on a regular basis. I even attended a Knit Night gathering at a local yarn shop. It's a great shop and I met some very charming ladies who were very kind to me. The key is to find your places, find your people.
All the same, I still have moments. I went to a local coffeehouse/bar called The Phoenix, which is located in the Arts district, and it is in a neighborhood that was so much like Dilworth that I was immediately dropped into a vat of viscous homesickness.
So I am finding my way here in Tulsa. As much as I complain about their driving ability and the road conditions, almost everyone has been very nice. And there is something to be said for that. Nothing lasts forever, and this is where I live right now. Sooner or later, I suppose this will be home.

"Home will be where the heart is, never were words so true,
 My heart's far, far away; home is too."  ---"Home" Beauty & the Beast

Honey, I Shrunk the Lasagna

What other one-dish meal is as versatile as lasagna? You can make it vegetarian, vegan, paleo, or clean (whatever the hell that means these days). In college, my best friends liked my lasagna, but oy vey was it a pain in the ass. I can’t imagine anyone who lives a busy life wanting to deal with that kind of prep work. So I have some tips and tricks that I have used to adapt my lasagna into something that suits me.

•       Oven-Ready Noodles: I cannot even tell you how much easier this makes it. Eliminates one whole prep step.
•       Cut the size. I used to make a 9x13 pan, but with just the Hubby and me, it made no sense to make that much. Now I make a 9x9 pan unless I’m planning to freeze half. Seems to work very nicely.
•       Use your leftovers. Red sauce is great refrigerator Velcro for any aging veggies or even leftover turkey meatloaf. You can even get cans of seasoned tomatoes at the store. It whittles the sauce-making portion down to negligible and it thwarts food waste. (PS- stick blender and no one knows about the spinach you slipped in there)
•     Skip the ricotta. Unless you absolutely love it and have to have it. It’s expensive and messy as all get out. I usually grab two bags of shredded cheese, one mozzarella and one Italian blend, and use that for all the layers.
•      Prep it ahead. For instance, since I’m unemployed (ugh!) I tend to prep for dinner in the mid-morning. I have more energy and find the cooking more enjoyable and less of a chore. But I know people who do this on a weekend as well.
•       If you are using eggplant in lieu of pasta, slice it length-wise, thin as you can, and salt it. Put it on a rack over a baking sheet and let it sit. The salt will pull out the excess water. Runny lasagna= calling for takeout.

So these are just things that I’ve done to improve my lasagna skills, since it is one of the few things I make that my hubby actually asks for (well done, me). I know all my hardcore traditional Italian folks are out there twitching at the idea of “fast” or “skinny” lasagna, but hey, what do you expect? I’m American.

Ain’t nobody got time for that.

A Grill of One's Own

Once upon a time, many years ago, I had a house. It was smallish but it had a tiny patio on which I placed my grill. I wasn't a chef at this point in my life, but I knew how to grill. In Florida, that is how you cook in the summer time. It's too hot to crank up the broiler/oven and who wants to stand over a hot stove? Fast forward and four apartments later, I have learned to live my life without a grill. Being without one does not deter me from steak though. It just means I have to improvise.

The broiler is a good choice, but you have to keep your eyes on it, it can get a little carried away. Cast iron skillets are great, but mine is small. Enter: the grill pan. I bought this one for about $40 about two months ago. It's 13" with a good offset handle and low sides, so you can easily flip burgers or fish.

I bought a nice steak from the local market here and decided to try my luck with it. The only obstacle that needed to be overcome was the fact that the steak was thick, and by the time it was cooked to the center, the outside was going to be blackened. Not tasty. Grills have lids you close, basically creating an oven inside. My grill pan has no lid. What to do?

Solution: Cake pan. Square aluminum cake pan. Pop it on over the steak and it will contain the heat and create a mini-oven. Steak is medium rare in the middle, which is how I like it, and not charcoal on the outside. And that's a beautiful thing.

And so we have lovely steaks, even without a grill, and we lived happily ever after.

The End.

The First Good Thing About Tulsa

Moving is hard. You don't know where you are, or how to get anywhere else. I'm fortunate, since my dear hubby has been here for a few days and he does know his way around. Mostly, when we aren't unpacking, we spend our time at Whole Foods or Target. Trust me to find the two worst places for those of us with no self-control.
But sometimes it's fun to be somewhere different. You find new things, new places, and sometimes cool pops up right where you would least expect it. For instance this:

That's a Psycho Shroom Pizza from Upper Crust. It is delicious. Possibly one of the better pizzas I have had. As long as I have this, I won't miss Mellow Mushroom so much. Also, they have this amazing thing...

That's Apple Pie. As in, apple pizza pie. Not what we expected, but undeniably a wonderful surprise.

Pizza imitating life. Well played, Tulsa.

"Just know you're not alone, cause I'm gonna make this place your home."
- "Home", Phillip Phillips

Regeneration (or What I Learned From Doctor Who)

“Now it’s time for one last bow, like all your other selves. Eleven’s hour is over now, the clock is striking twelves.” –The Time of the Doctor

When you think about it, in a way, we all regenerate. We’re all different people throughout our lives. Maybe we don’t literally change our face and body, but we alter our appearance, change course, start over. I think that it’s good, a way of moving forward, quick march. As long as we remember all the people that we have been. My time as a Carolina girl grows short now, only a few days left till my regeneration into a Tulsa resident. Part of me is excited, another part says “I don’t want to go.”

I lived in my hometown for twenty-six years, except for a few years of college, in a town even smaller than the one I was from. Sometimes, when you’ve been in a place so long, it’s harder to change yourself, to become what you want to be. Because people think they know you, because they have always known you. You are fighting a losing battle with your previous self, because sometimes people don’t like change.

I left. I moved myself to another city, further from home than I’d ever been. I changed careers; I changed a lot of things. I learned so much from my time here. I became mostly the person I want to be here. There’s always room for improvement of course. And things that aren’t changing are said to be dying. So here we go again. First, just an address, then it’s more. You change. You become. You regenerate. I’m almost looking forward to it, I’m curious to see who I’m going to become this time.

And there’s the catch. Because Jacksonville gave me roots and Charlotte gave me wings. It makes it hard to leave. Not that there haven’t been hard times and disappointments here. There have been, but on balance, good has outweighed the bad.

I won’t forget one day of this time, not one hour. I wouldn’t change even a minute. And it’s okay to be sad or scared. That’s part of being human. But there’s no stopping regeneration. The change is coming soon, so we shall see if Tulsa can teach me to fly.

Charlotte…goodbye.

“I will always remember when the Doctor was me.” ---The Time of the Doctor